Wednesday, March 12, 2008

10+ Things I Like About You

Usually when girls get together they like to discuss men and/or their love lives, right? Yes this is true especially up here at BYU. The other day I talked on the phone with one of my best friends Breann Hewitt. We got to talking about her new boy that she really likes and I got to talking about someone that I was starting to like. Anyway, this got us talking about the things we like/look for when searching for a significant other. It was interesting to see what we both liked. Yes, I have had crappy relationships in the past...well just 2ish...but I have learned a lot from them. Here's my list.

*Look for red flags RIGHT AWAY! Don't ignore them.
*Don't think I can change the person myself.
*Don't be tooooo nice. I need to put him in his place if he disrespects me or if he manipulates me or makes me feel guilty. I shouldn't take crap from anyone!
*He should bring out the best in me...everyday.
*He should make me happy through words, thoughts, and actions.
*Get out if he is too physical and/or manipulative.
*Make sure he is not in a spiritual rut. Does he have a testimony? Does he love the Savior? Does he honor his priesthood responsibilities? Can he take me to the temple?
*Watch how he treats others.
*The only addiction he is allowed to have is laughter :D

Now those are just a few of the things that I LOOK OUT FOR. But I would also like to make a list of things that I LOOK FOR. I have neglected to do this before to determine getting into a relationship but I have now realized that was stupid. :) Here is what I long to have...

I want a guy that:

*#1 can make me laugh.
*Cares for me.
*Can bring a smile to my face.
*ABSOLUTELY can make me happy...EVERYDAY!!!
*Brings out the best in me.
*Is quirky like me...and my family!!! Sometimes this is a hard thing to find. I don't want someone that just laughs at us but joins us in our quirkiness.
*Has the same common quirks...such as eating the crust off of a sandwich first, then smashing it and eating the now thinned down meal. What are the odds of that happening? How cute would that be if it were so?
*Has common values.
*Can handle my sassiness.
*Is frugal.
*Can stand my OCD-ness.
*Likes a lil bit of the romantic schtuff in a relationship.
*Loves and wants children.
*A mission is a great bonus.
*Is responsible
*Is spiritual.
*Has a growing testimony and is not ashamed to share it with others.
*Loves to work and works hard. He must have a passion in what he does.
*Can support a family.
*Is NOT intimidated by me...especially right off the bat.
*Can start a conversation out of no where.
*Is smart. I love to sit and have intelligent conversations. So, if he can do this with me he gets the major pointage right there.
*Makes me feel special without even trying.
*Uses the words cute, beautiful, and lovely instead of hott and sexy. This tells me how he sees me not only as a woman but as a daughter of God.
*Leaves me speechless with his kind words and deeds.
*Is NOT high-maintenance or materialistic.
*Is NOT shallow
*Is NOT vain. This means that I don't need a Brad Pitt or a Justin Timberlake. He doesn't have to be tall, dark, and handsome. It would be nice but the insides are much more important to me than the outside. If I find him cute and attractive then I'm content.
*Is beautiful on the inside more than on the outside. But it is also a bonus if he looks dang good in a suit (I'm silly I know lol).
*Loves to hold me and kiss me sweetly on the tip of my nose and forehead (Yet again I say I'm silly. I just like those sweet lil things).
*Is a great listener!!!
*Can't stand to be away from me for too long.
*Strives for eternal life.
*Is loyal, respectful, honest, trustworthy, comforting, kind, obedient.
*Has a prodigious personality, dry wit, contagious smile, great communication skills.
*Wants the best for me.
*Is my best friend!!!!!!!!!!! I want him to be my best friend...forever.

S0, I hope this doesn't sound too picky but these are just some things that I love and that I have seen in dad, Curtis, Mike, and Taylor. I too want my husband to possess these traits. I want someone to make me happy and make me laugh every single day. I want happiness to not only come from his words and actions but also just from his smile alone. Yes, I know that my day will come. I'm not impatient. I'm not worrying but I am just longing to find that one person that makes me feel special everyday outside of my family members that I have known my whole life. And I too want to reciprocate the happiness and love. I too want to make him feel special. I too want someone to love me just as much as I love him. Yay. I can't wait.


Quincy said...

Hey Ash,

Your list is perfect. Don't let anyone tell you that your expectations are too high! They are dead on and those traits are exactly what anyone should be expecting in their future spouse. In my limited experience (I mean, we haven't even been married 3 months) we have enjoyed all those things in our relationship.

Just keep doing what you know is right, enjoy life, and he will come along. And he will sweep you off your feet, and he will count himself blessed to be married to you (you in your totality!


Lyd said...

CRAP DANGIT!! This makes me want a man so dang bad! DANGIT!! Why oh why? This just seems to be a continuous thought that runs thru my head all the day long!

I love everything that you wrote, because that's pretty much what I want too. "Some day my prince will come." Some day, some day...but lets hope not too long. :)

ashleyO said...

Thanks Quincy. You are awesome and I miss your face. 3 months already??? Yeah I guess you are right! Wow time flies and I bet you and Mindy are just so happy :) But yes I am trying my hardest and best to be doing what's right so when and if he has come along I will know. I'm pretty sure my background on my blog has been an inspiration lol.

Lyd, I'm sure it does make you want a man right now. And yes I know it won't be too long for you whether it's in a year or 4...still not a long time ya know? Everyone thought I was going to be the first one married right out of high school...then it was the first one out of my freshman hall....then it was the first one out of my roommates...yeah that was in 2004 when the first roomie, Liz, was married. Then Michelle later that year. Now Shani is engaged and Mary is almost engaged. 4 years later may seem like a long time but really it has only been a hairline in our timeline we call 'life' (haha wow corny or what) We are next!!! WooWoot!

-KJ said...

Guess what. I eat the crust first too. Oh wait, we are related.

Great list. Don't change it. Only add to it. He's out there. Just make sure you do the same things for him. That is what I need to work on!!!

ashleyO said...

Yes, we are related. Imagine that. K I won't change it but I will add to it. and yes i will do the same things for him. I may be doing that right now...

...and yes get on that girl! haha

Alli Easley said...

I love this list! Funny thing is, about half way through the "good" list, I was like "oh wow, Mike does that, oh and this, oh and he does that...and that!" and then I got to the bottom and realized that I love the fact that I'm married to someone who you look to as a good catch. He's out there, you may have met him, you may not have, but whatever the circumstances, hold out til you get what the Lord wants for you. You can never understand how important it is to be in a good relationship. It is priceless, and I would know. I've been on both Yeah, learn from me. Love ya, sista.

ashleyO said...

yes i knew it was spam. Um, yes I do look up to him as a good catch. I see how he treats the kids and you and it makes me smile. I do that for all of the men in our family. We are a great group of people. I too want to be as fortunate as you all. I have learned from you. I want to be in a GOOD relationship azwuhl. I have also learned from all of the siblings, hence my list (i wanted to say hence the hat but i didn't).

I'm being patient and I'm super happy right now p.s. :D oh and a hot mess.

ashleyO said...

P.S. part duex.
I love you too sistah fren.

Mandy said...

i love this post. its so awesome you know exactly what you want and never settle for less. :) your prince charming im sure is doing the same for you. :)

shauna said...

Ashley, that is amazing. I wish I had read this before I came up last weekend. I am so glad you and Breann talked about these things. I love your list. You are on the right path if you keep measuring yourself to that list and you will find him as well.


ashleyO said...

Yes we did talk about these things. I love my list too. And I soooo stick to it. I do.

I love you too!!!